Naughty But Nice

Naughty But Nice

Using erotic inspirations together

Now, more than ever before, there’s a wealth of erotic material available to enjoy. While some people are anti porn, there’s no need to watch anything exploitative in this day and age. There’s plenty of material available that’s ethically produced, sex positive and reflects real sex rather than porno stereotypes. And that’s before you even take into account the glut of home-produced films that people willingly share online every day.

The stereotypical view suggests that men get off on visuals and women get off on words, but while it’s true to say that modern erotic novels have a mass female following, research has shown women get just as aroused by visual depictions of sex as men do. Conversely, many men enjoy reading erotic stories. And if you like the idea of hearing not-so-sweet words whispered in your ear, there are countless erotic audio books and podcasts available, covering almost every kind of sex you could imagine. Of course, you can always read each other erotic bedtime stories too – though there’s no guarantee they’ll lead to a good night’s sleep…

Many counsellors recommend erotic materials to couples looking to balance libidos or spice up their relationships. However, it’s worth discussing with your partner first: suddenly revealing a porn playlist or your secret fetish may not be well received. Talk about the sort of things that you both enjoy, or browse together online taking it in turns to type in search terms if you’re too shy to talk about it out loud. As with sharing any fantasies, it’s best to start off with the milder end of your desires and only work your way up to your wilder preferences after gauging your lover’s response.

Photos, videos, stories and audio are all available in abundance, so you’ll be spoilt for choice: the more precisely you define what you like, the better a match you’ll find – and the more your lover will learn about your desires too.

Erotic material can be used as easy foreplay, inspiration for a steamy night in. Open your mind, be prepared to explore and who knows what excitement you might find.

(Reproduced from https://www.durex.co.uk/en-gb/explore-sex/article/naughty-but-nice)

5 Sure Signs That There is Sexual Chemistry

5 Sure Signs That There is Sexual Chemistry

(Reproduced from : https://www.durex.co.uk/en-gb/explore-sex/article/5-sure-signs-that-there-is-sexual-chemistry )

Sexual attraction can easily be confused for either physical attraction or infatuation. However, sexual attraction also known as sexual chemistry, is the carnal desire to be intimate with one another. While physical attraction can be contributed to your partner’s appearance or behaviour, it may or may not lead to romance. So if you are trying to figure out if there are sparks flying between you and your partner, here are a few sure signs that there is sexual chemistry.

Mirroring one another

Not only is it an indicator of attraction but sexual interest. Mirroring can be used in many different situations to tell if your partner is into you. If you touch your hair, do they do the same? If you shift in your chair do they change their position so their body reflects yours? If so, then these subtle changes are a way to project being non-threatening. Scientists believe the more your partner can recognise themselves in your behaviour, the deeper the attraction goes.

Playful touch

One of the easiest ways to express your emotions and desire towards your partner is through touch. Light and spontaneous, rubbing and prolonged body contact can re-enforce a level of intimacy that may exist between you and your partner. Whether you decide to suggestively rub your partner’s legs or you brush your fingertips lightly on their arms; playfully touching your partner is a powerful way to build sexual tension while leaving you both aroused.

An undeniable pull

You know that magnetic feeling you get when you see someone that you are instantly attracted to; you find yourself having an uncontrollable urge and desire to be close to them. When you see someone who sexually excites you, your body will react to respond to these feelings accordingly. Your sense of personal space changes when you are around your partner who sexually excites you. So if you feel that spark that you can’t deny, don’t dismiss it; it’s real.

You don’t mind experimenting

When it comes to dipping your toes into new sexual dalliances, trusting your partner allows for a greater sexual experience. Whether it’s trying out that sex toy that you’ve always wanted to try, or creating your own sex games inspired by Fifty Shades Darker, experimenting with your partner can ignite burning sexual desires between you two. If you’re turned on by your partner’s touch, harness those emotions for a wild night of uncontrollable pleasure.

There’s deep sexual trust

Sex with your partner is not only a physical act but an emotional one that involves a high level of trust. From discussing your sexual history to knowing your STI status, being comfortable with your partner to discuss these things go hand in hand with great sex. Not only does it positively reflect the respect that you two have for one another, it allows you both to explore one another without any judgement or fear.

Three Tips for Intense Sex

Three Tips for Intense Sex

(reproduced from http://www.durex.ie/explore-sex/articles/three-tips-for-intense-sex/)

Give us five adjectives for the best sex you’ve ever had – GO:

It’s a pretty good bet that the word ‘intense’ made that list somewhere… and here we go “tips for great sex” :

Intensity is something that all great sex seems to feature, and though it may seem easy to work out why intense sex is great, it’s a little harder to work out why great sex is intense. “Intense” sex could refer to a quickie that leaves your fingernails in their back, or a slow, eye-contact-keeping, melting in to each other. Because of this, it could easily seem a mystery exactly what it is that gives great sex its intensity. Let’s take a look at what it is that intense sex tends to share, and from this, we can work out how pretty much anyone can inject a bit of intensity for better sex.

Anticipation

Anticipation can mean a long, slow build up over a number of hours, but it doesn’t have to. An entire day’s worth of anticipation can be compressed into the few seconds in which you throw caution to the wind, and start tearing each other’s clothes off.

Passion

This links in with anticipation, as it requires a complete losing of yourself in the moment, embracing the fact that you need this more than anything else in the world right now. Time stands still, and it could be five minutes or five hours, but it doesn’t matter – nothing else matters.

Connection

This doesn’t mean that you have to be in a long term relationship in order to have great sex – a connection is something that can be felt instantly, and last just a few hours. When sex is shared between two people who already feel a love connection though, that level of togetherness can deepen to such a point that you forget that you’re actually two separate people.

Intensify your sex life

When things like anticipation, passion, or connection are focused on too closely, they instantly lose their magic. If it was easy as just deciding that you want to feel these things, then every time would be the best time. There are things you can do though, to make sure that you don’t take these things for granted. Be spontaneous, and don’t resist trying new things (as long as they don’t make you uncomfortable), and allow yourself to be lost in the moment. All of life’s little worries will still be there when you’re done, so free yourself from them and allow yourself to fully experience each other.

Most importantly though, get to know each other. Get to know what the other likes and dislikes during sex, but make sure you get to know them outside of the bedroom as well. If there is one thing that can provide intense, better sex, it’s that mutual respect, and connection – which isn’t something that can be created, it’s earned.

Safe Sex is Good Sex

Safe Sex is Good Sex

Learn about different types of contraception to help have happy and safe sex…

(reproduced from http://www.durex.ie/explore-sex/articles/safe-sex-is-good-sex/)

Male Condom

Top 4 Plus Points

  • Only need to be used when you have sex
  • Help protect against STIs, including HIV and AIDS
  • Easily available
  • Come in many shapes and sizes to suit everyone

Any bad points?

  • Putting them on can interrupt sex
  • Some people claim condoms reduce sensitivity during sex

Where can I get them from?

Widely available from Pharmacies in Malta and Gozo, as well as on this site. Also widely available in vending machines (please click here for information on NMArrigo vending operation). Of course, we suggest using Durex Condoms, though other brands can be found.

Female Condom

The Plus Points

  • Only need to be used when you have sex
  • Can help protect against STIs, including HIV/AIDS
  • Can be put in anytime before sex

Any bad points?

  • Putting them in can interrupt sex
  • Some people claim condoms reduce sensitivity during sex
  • Not widely available

Where can I get them from?

Not widely available.

The Pill

Top 5 Plus Points

  • Sometimes makes a woman’s periods lighter, shorter and less painful
  • Can help with pre-menstrual syndrome/ tension/acne
  • Doesn’t interfere with sex, you still need a condom for STDs
  • Reduces the risk of fibroids (non-cancerous tumours of the womb), ovarian cysts and breast disease

Any bad points?

  • Some women may suffer from nausea, breast tenderness, bleeding between periods, headaches and mood changes. Changing pill may help.
  • May increase blood pressure
  • Doesn’t protect against STIs, including HIV/AIDS
  • They have to be taken either every day or 21 out of 28 days on your cycle.
  • Contraceptive protection can be reduced during sickness and while taking antibiotics
  • It is usually recommended to take a different method of contraception during breastfeeding
  • There are also some uncommon but serious side effects which should be discussed with your doctor if you are considering using the pill.

Where can I get them from?

The pill is available from a GP or from family planning clinics with a prescription. It can also be purchased from most pharmacies with a prescription.

Contraceptive Implant

Top Plus Points

  • Doesn’t interfere with sex
  • Can be used if you are breastfeeding
  • Normal levels of fertility return after the implant is removed
  • Contraception lasts for between three and five years

Any bad points?

  • Periods may change, bleeding can be irregular
  • Possible side effects include headaches, acne, tender breasts, weight gain abdominal pain and bloating
  • Very rarely an infection can occur in the arm where the implant is inserted.
  • A small procedure is required to both fit and remove it.
  • Can occasionally be difficult to remove the implant
  • Some women experience depression and mood swings
  • Doesn’t protect against STIs, including HIV/AIDS

Where can I get one?

The contraceptive implant is only available from GPs or family planning clinics, because it has to be fitted by a trained doctor or nurse.

Contraceptive Injection

Top Plus Points

  • Doesn’t interfere with sex
  • Can be used if you are breastfeeding
  • It reduces the risk of developing pelvic inflammatory disease and cancer of the womb.
  • Offers contraceptive protection for 8-12 weeks
  • May reduce heavy, painful periods and help with premenstrual symptoms for some women

Any bad points?

  • Periods may change, bleeding can be irregular (this can continue for several months or as long as the injection lasts)
  • Possible side effects include headaches, acne, tender breasts, weight gain, mood swings abdominal pain and bloating
  • Any side effects will probably last as long as the injection lasts (8-12 weeks)
  • Sometimes fertility can take more than a year to return to normal after stopping the injection
  • Doesn’t protect against STIs, including HIV/AIDS

Where can I get one?

The contraceptive injection is only available from GPs and family planning clinics.

Diaphragms, caps and sponges

Top Plus Points

  • Only need to be used when you have sex.
  • Can be put in at any convenient time before sex.
  • Diaphragms and caps may give some protection against STIs, sponges do not.

Any bad points?

  • Some women have a problem with cystitis.
  • Can take time to learn how to use them effectively.
  • Diaphragms and caps only provide limited protection against STIs, including HIV/AIDS.

Where can I get them from?

Each must be initially fitted by a doctor or nurse at a GP surgery or family planning clinic. Once fitted, they can be bought from pharmacies.

Male and female sterilization

Is a permanent method of contraception and is a surgical procedure where the tubes that supply sperm in a man and the tubes that carry the egg in a woman are cut or tied.
Both are practically 100% effective in controlling pregnancy

Top Plus Points

  • Doesn’t interfere with sex.
  • It is permanent.
  • Male sterilisation is a quick and simple operation with less chance of failure than female sterilisation.

Any bad points?

  • Both procedures are permanent and, though possible, cannot be easily reversed.
  • It can take from two months for all sperm to disappear from the semen, so extra contraception must be used before you have a semen test to confirm there are no sperm left.
  • The tubes may rejoin and fertility may return (this isn’t common).
  • Don’t protect against ANY STIs, including HIV/AIDS.
  • Female sterilisation usually involves a general anaesthetic, male sterilisation usually requires a local anaesthetic.

Where can I find out more?

Because this is a surgical procedure it must only be performed by a trained doctor. However, family planning clinics, sexual health clinics and GPs will be able to give you more information..

(Draft : more coming later..)

Timing is Everything

Timing is Everything

Are you ready for sex?

(reproduced from http://www.durex.ie/explore-sex/articles/timing-is-everything/)

Everyone is ready for sex at a different stage and only you can know if it’s right for you. This checklist will help you decide whether you’re ready. If you have any doubts, it’s better to wait. You only get one first time, after all, either in this relationship or ever!

  1. Do you feel happy at the idea of having sex?
  2. Do you feel physically, emotionally and mentally ready for sex?
  3. Do you know what sex entails? Penetrative sex is just one way to give each other sexual pleasure, but oral sex and manual play can both be fun too. Just remember, oral carries risks of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) too so you’ll still need to use a condom or dental dam (square of latex) to cover the area.
  4. Do you trust and respect your partner, and think that they feel the same way about you?
  5. Are you confident that you can insist on safe sex? You can get pregnant/get someone pregnant and/or contract STIs every time you have sex, including the first time.
  6. Do you feel happy with the location and timing? And does your partner feels the same way?
  7. Are you aware of the possible outcomes of sex? And is the person you’re considering having sex with? If so, do you feel ready to deal with any issues that may arise?
  8. Is there anything that scares you about having sex and, if so, have you discussed this with your partner?
  9. Do you want sex because you feel ready or because you’re worried you may lose your partner if you don’t?
  10. Does it feel right? Your gut instinct is worth listening to – if something doesn’t feel quite as it should be, you may want to wait a little longer before making a decision you might regret.